Things Pop When They're Ready

Normally I blog on Sundays but things have been so crazy I’ve been unable to do so until now. I moved into a new place about a week ago and then I had guests stay with me so it’s been quite a whirlwind!

All this week though I’ve noticed how things pop when they’re ready. As mentioned, I moved into a new place that’s a studio plus an office. In order to separate my bedroom from my living room, I bought a Japanese screen from Craigslist.


The night before I picked up the screen I checked my wallet and all I had was $44. (The screen cost $45.) My new location is not as commercial as my other one, so I’m not near an ATM, nor is an ATM on my way to public transportation, so I wanted to avoid a special trip if at all possible. I dumped all the coins in my wallet on the floor and came up $0.26 short. I searched my whole apartment looking for the extra change. I scoured the bottom of every bag and backpack I own trying to come up with the money, running through scenarios in my head. Perhaps she would be fine with $44.74.

It struck me I should check my foreign money because, hey, you never know, right? I just got back from Italy, so maybe my American money would be mixed in. I searched my euros, nope, nothing. Then I pulled out my money from Costa Rica, a country I visited 11 year ago. Mixed in with all the coins was a $1 American coin. I kid you not. That coin was sitting in a bag at the bottom of my dresser for ELEVEN YEARS waiting for this very purpose it seemed.


I laughed out loud when I saw it and I think I said, “You have to be kidding me.” Things pop when they’re ready.

What’s also interesting to me is I’ve known someone for 10 years – we run in the same circles, have similar friends – and yet up until recently we’ve been acquaintances. Familiar acquaintances, yes, but I didn’t really consider him a friend. More like in between a friend and an acquaintance. Then in August he started dating his partner and things changed. We started hanging out more and became real friends. So much so that I visited him in the hospital yesterday after he fractured his jaw while breaking up a fight. I didn’t know I felt that way until his partner sent out a mass message on facebook detailing what happened. Somehow I didn’t even question whether I would visit him, it was a given.

While at the hospital he was a pathetic sight – bandages strapped to his head, immobilizing his jaw, not able to talk. All communication was through paper. He wrote down on a piece of paper, “Thanks for visiting me,” and I said, “Of course! That’s what you do for friends and family!” And I meant it. Because somehow we crossed the line of acquaintance and into friendship even though I’ve known him for a long time. Things pop when they’re ready.

I’m going to circle this post back to the last one I wrote “Starburst,” because I think the same principle applies. Matt Damon and Julia Roberts “popped,” they became famous when they were ready, or the universe was ready, or whatever “it” is that had to be ready. The exciting thing is we never know when the pop will happen.

I dream of a world where we understand all things in due time. A world where we know there’s no need to feel impatient because things pop when they’re ready. A world where we live each day in joy, feeling present, and alive because there is nothing more exciting than being on planet Earth when at any moment things can pop.

Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.

Starburst

This weekend I re-watched Mystic Pizza and noticed Matt Damon makes an appearance in the movie:

Matt Damon at 18 in "Mystic Pizza."

What struck me about this is the "you-never-know" factor. Here Damon only had a line or two in a movie with Julia Roberts before she was famous. When they did their scene do you think either could anticipate Julia Roberts would become one of the highest-paid actresses in Hollywood, or that Matt Damon would become a heartthrob? No. They were just doing a scene, following their passion and then BOOM, their fame exploded like a starburst. For Roberts it took another two years with the release of "Pretty Woman." For Damon it took another nine with the release of "Good Will Hunting."

What I love about this, what I find so inspiring, is that moment before they were famous. Why did it take two years for Roberts and nine years for Damon? What made each of those films "the one" that made them a star? Sometimes I take it for granted that people weren't always famous. That Matt Damon hasn't forever been glossing magazine covers, that there was a point where he was a normal guy, playing bit parts, trying to make ends meet, and then the stars aligned, he had the right connections, and all of a sudden he became a household name.

I find this incredibly fascinating because we could all be on the brink of something and we just don't know. I could film my niece singing a rap song and she could become a youtube star. Joe Schmo could have an asteroid land in his yard that's covered with a key ingredient to eradicate AIDS. Little Susie Ray could go to the mall and be spotted by a model scout and start walking runways. In life we have no idea what's around the corner and how big it can become, and that's what's so interesting to me.

I dream of a world where we live each day with a sense of wonder and mystery because we remember we have no idea what's next. A world where we keep pursuing our dreams even when it seems like they'll lead to nowhere. A world where we are open and honest with ourselves and allow whatever will be to be.

Another world is not only possible, it's probable.

Fast-Paced Cohesion

I still have the flu so I won’t be writing anything major but I still wanted to share something that inspires me. I LOVE this video of people flashmobbing a 9-year-old’s arcade:

(And here's an article about it.) What I love about this is how a little boy so earnestly built an arcade and waited everyday for customers. They never came until one day they did. And not just one but an entire crowd. I love how quickly it all came together. Everything lined up and exploded into something bigger and better than the boy asked for or expected. Amazing.

This video also illustrates to me the power of people to coalesce, to come together and create something beautiful. It shows how quickly things can work and people’s dreams can come true. Instead of taking years something can take days; that’s incredible!

I dream of a world where we support each other. Where we bond to allow everyone’s dreams to manifest. A world where we work together to create something magical and amazing. A world where we coalesce to create something better than we could have done alone.

Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.

The Beauty of Life

Sometimes I'm too verbal and I need to turn off my brain and engage my senses. I thought it might be nice on this momentous day (I mean how often do Passover, Easter, AND a full moon coalesce?) to revel in the beauty of Earth and to remind ourselves to stay present.



I don't know about you, but this video shows me things aren't as gloomy and depressing as they seem. It shows me another world is not only possible, it's probable.

Seeing Beyond Racism in "The Hunger Games"

There has been a lot of talk about racism and The Hunger Games. The New Yorker has a blog about how often in literature we imagine characters to be white until proven black. And Jezebel.com posted a story about how many viewers of The Hunger Games movie have posted racist tweets. For those of you who don’t know, Suzanne Collins explicitly states in her trilogy characters Rue and Thresh are “dark-skinned” but somehow that escaped many readers’ notice. What’s so appalling is some viewers said the movie was “ruined” because the characters are black. And that because Rue was black her death wasn’t as sad. This is going to sound strange but I’m inspired by all this.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m NOT inspired by the racism that’s being displayed, I’m inspired by other people’s response to that racism. I’m inspired that there is outrage. I’m inspired that the twitter accounts of those who posted racist comments have been taken down. I’m inspired there’s a lot of fuss – and rightly so – about the idea being black makes a person less innocent.

It wasn’t so long ago racists were the majority in this country. It wasn’t so long ago lynchings were a common practice and newspapers advocated for mistreatment of others. The fact that now racism is so denounced, that it is so politically incorrect is an amazing thing. Seriously. I know we’re not making as much progress as we’d like, but I’d rather focus on the fact we’re making progress at all. Jim Crow laws no longer exist. The majority of people are loving, compassionate, and more open-minded than not. I think that’s been illustrated by the outrage at the comments people have been posting in regard to The Hunger Games.

I’d also like to point out racism is a belief and beliefs can be changed. It’s not a disease. It’s not something you have or you don’t. Racist people can change their minds, see the error of their ways, because more often than not it’s due to ignorance. They’re stereotyping out of fear, they’re not seeing a person as an individual but rather a category. I’ll even admit here that when I was younger I was a little bit racist. I used to stick to certain circles and not stray far from them. That all changed when I went to the National Conference for Community and Justice’s Camp Anytown. Sometimes you just don’t know better and you need to be taught. But that’s the point – open-mindedness can be taught. When you undergo exercises showing other people have experienced similar things even if they’re a different race, it builds understanding, and compassion. Racism cannot exist in those circumstances and that’s what inspires me.

I dream of a world where we continue to eradicate racism. A world where we understand all of us bleed, all of us have hopes and dreams. All of us are people. I dream of a world where we can see each other as individuals. A world where we see people for who they are. A world where we value a person’s heart over the color of their skin. A world where we come together in the spirit of unity, acknowledging we are all brothers and sisters.

Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.

Born this Way

Most of you probably associate the phrase “born this way” with Lady Gaga’s song. One of the things I love about Lady Gaga is she so unabashedly loves and accepts herself and she encourages others to do the same. Her song, and subsequent foundation, center primarily on LGBTQ youth but there are another sect who were “born this way.” Addicts. I’ve been tip-toeing around this for years, but I’m finally going to say it: I’m an addict. I just broke a bunch of rules by announcing that to the world, so before I go further, please know I don’t speak on behalf of anyone, I’m not representative of any organization. I can only tell you about me and my experience.

It may surprise some of you to hear I’m an addict considering I don’t drink or do drugs, there are no track lines on my arms. From the outside I look pretty “normal.” But I very much am an addict. In my post from a few weeks ago, I wrote about how I’ve been crying off and on now that my book Just a Girl from Kansas has been sent to friends and family members. After talking with a good friend, I realized it’s because I’ve felt deeply ashamed. I’ve felt ashamed of revealing to the entire world my private thoughts and behaviors. I’ve been ashamed to let people know I’m an addict. That’s probably because there’s still a stigma attached to addicts. They’re often portrayed in the media as engaging in risky behavior or otherwise self-destructing. There are very few positive role models for addicts. I think it’s because there is an air of secrecy, of anonymity. And the anonymity can breed shame because if you don’t tell people, if they’re not supposed to know, isn’t like you have a dirty little secret?

I’m writing this post because I’ve heard so many people this week talk about how ashamed they feel of being an addict, myself included. How it’s a terrible, awful thing that no one but other addicts can know about. The disease becomes a moral issue, makes me a “bad” person. I’m writing this post for other addicts, and for anyone else who thinks they have to be ashamed of who they are. I’m here to tell you the person who smokes pot, the person who pays for sex, the person who drowns themselves in alcohol, or gambles away their life savings is not a bad person. They’re a person in pain. None of those people, myself included, chose to be this way. Nobody likes the fact they feel compelled to do something like pull food from the garbage can and eat it. Nobody wants to admit to that. We were born this way.

I am not a bad person. I’m a very good person. My creator made me this way so how can I say it’s something to be ashamed of. Do you tell a lily to be ashamed it smells the way it does? Do you tell a cat to be ashamed it likes to chase mice? So why should I be ashamed of the way that I am? I really can’t help it. Instead of wasting so much time and energy “hiding” my secret or berating myself for who I am, I’d rather practice love and acceptance. I’d rather say, this is who I am, and who I am is just fine. Because it is. Because I was born this way.

I dream of a world where we all feel loved and accepted for who we are. A world where we know we were all born the way we are and there’s no need to feel ashamed of it. A world where we treat everyone with compassion because behind their words and actions probably lies a person in a lot of pain. A person who wants to know it’s safe for me them to be themselves. I dream of a world where that person knows that it is safe to be who they are because who they are is beautiful. Because they were born that way. Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.

Go with Grace

Wow. Things are happening so quickly in my life it’s making my head spin and bringing up a bit of fear, to be honest. This time last week I was in Italy, which is why I didn’t blog, and the Sunday before that I was in Austria. My whole trip was an experience of grace, of being showered with love from above, and that’s what I want to share with you – how life can be so sweet it can make your heart burst.

The whole trip started off on a good note because I found out my favorite painting, Gustav Klimt’s “The Kiss” would be exhibiting in Vienna in honor of Klimt’s 150th birthday:
When I got to the airport the airline crew told me they could only get me to Germany and not to Vienna because there was a strike in Germany at the time. When I asked what they could do for me, they suggested a later flight connecting through London. On that flight I had an entire row all to myself so I’d say it worked out in my favor.

I was in Vienna primarily for work but I had many sweet moments, like getting a bit turned around and someone coming up to me and saying in German, “Do you need help?” to which I responded in English, “Yes, I’m lost.” The woman walked me to my street before we determined my location was too far away and I’d gotten off the Ubahn (subway) one stop too early.

Also, on my last day in Vienna I finally made it to the Belvedere, which was housing “The Kiss.” I got sooo lost getting to the museum because I walked through a construction zone but it’s a good thing I did because I passed by a store that sold pay-as-you-go phones, a necessary purchase I had been unable to buy until that moment. If I hadn’t gotten lost I wouldn’t have walked by the store. It’s the little moments of grace that really get to me. Like the time I rushed to catch my train to Venice, thinking I’d be late, but instead the train was delayed by 5 minutes. When I heard that announcement I smiled to myself because it’s as if the train had been late for me.

There were also grander examples of grace, like when I was in Rome. I checked facebook the Friday evening I arrived and a monk from the States announced, “I’m in Rome.” I messaged him and said “I’m in Rome!” He told me of a group meditation the next day, and how to get there via the train. I walked on the second to last train car and sitting at the end, in a seat facing me, was a friend of mine. The monk told me I’d see my friend but I didn’t anticipate running into him on the train. I squealed in delight and my friend was surprised to say the least. We ended up spending the day together on Sunday – touring the Colosseum, the church containing Michelangelo's Moses with the horns, and more. It was an especially sweet encounter because Friday night I felt sad anticipating the friend I’d been traveling with had to go back to France. My heart sunk as I thought about walking around in a strange city by myself, and instead I hung out with my friend and two friends of his. I couldn’t ask for any more grace.

The cap the trip off, on Tuesday morning I slept through my alarm, woke up 10 minutes after my cab arrived, and still managed to catch my flight with time to spare. I don’t know how it happened but it did.

That brings us to today. I found out the day after I came back from Europe I need to move out of my current house – not because my housemates hate me or anything, it’s because they have a really good friend moving to the city. Today I looked at Craigslist just for kicks although I wasn’t prepared to move out until April 21st – everybody is posting things available now or for April 1st – when I stumbled across a listing that sounded perfect. I e-mailed the guy today, looked at the apartment today, and told him today I wanted it. Nothing is confirmed but it’s quite possible I’ll be moving out in a few weeks into an apartment that’s bigger than my old one for less money. The grace I’m experiencing is staggering.

I mention all this not to brag about what’s going on in my life but rather to illustrate anything is possible. To showcase how the universe can conspire to grace us. To give us everything we asked for and more. To demonstrate what it means to be in the universal flow.

I dream of a world where we all experience untold sweetness. A world where go with the grace being bestowed upon us. A world where we take advantage of what comes our way. A world where we live in wonder as we watch the magic unfolding in our lives.

Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.