At Peace with the Inevitable

Certain things in my life feel inevitable. What's going on with my diet right now feels like one of them. Some of you know I have a long list of food allergies that keeps getting longer. The frustrating part for me is if I eat something frequently enough, I become allergic to it.

The other week I noticed when I eat figs, now my mouth burns. Never mind that I've eaten figs for YEARS without any problem. Suddenly, they're a problem. If you know anything about health, you might be saying, "It's sound like you have leaky gut." You would be correct. However, following the leaky gut diet (i.e., no gluten, cutting out carbs, low sugar, etc.) hasn't made a lick of difference and in fact I'm only getting worse.

Yeah, not eating any of this right now. Photo by Waranya Mooldee on Unsplash

I called my doctor in frustration and she recommended the Elemental Diet. The Elemental Diet is food broken down into its most elemental form. It's a powdered meal replacement. It's something physicians give to patients with Crohn's disease and to recovering anorexics, among others. The recommended procedure is to eat only the powder mixed with water for two to three weeks to give the digestive system a break. That means no solid food. I cried when my doctor suggested the regimen and also freaked out, worrying that I'd feel hungry. It's only been a couple of days, but surprisingly, I feel good. My body doesn't hurt after eating. The powder is filling. My mood has improved. Will I do this for three weeks? I don't know -- it's one meal at a time for me right now.

What's interesting is in my yoga and meditation group we're supposed to fast 11 days after the full and new moon. Concessions are made for people who don't have good health, but if someone can fast, they are encouraged to do so. And fasting runs the gamut from consuming absolutely nothing, including no water, to merely abstaining from rice and fried foods. The reason fasting is encouraged is it gives the body a break and also the time spent eating, cleaning, and prepping can be used for spiritual pursuits. I'm finding the same is true for me. Thus far, I'm meditating more and feeling closer to my higher power.

The reason why this whole thing feels inevitable is I'm finally engaging in a practice that is a big part of my spiritual tradition. My life is oriented around spirituality, around moving closer to something bigger than myself, and fasting is allowing me to do that. It feels like I would always end up here. That I would always see the benefit of fasting for my body, mind, and spirit. Because as I've seen with other practices, like yoga, eventually something happens to get me to come around. I'm not sure I'm doing a great job explaining myself, but that's OK. For me and for everyone there are certain things in our lives that feel inevitable, and that's what I'm speaking to.

I dream of a world where we accept the inescapability of certain things. A world where we recognize we were always going to end up someplace or doing something specific. That there are some things we can't fight and instead we give in to them. A world where we feel at peace with the inevitable.

Another world is not only possible, it's probable.